emotions – I Heart Intelligence.com https://iheartintelligence.com Mon, 19 Apr 2021 11:46:32 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.7.2 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=wp-content/uploads/2019/05/cropped-IHI-square-32x32.png emotions – I Heart Intelligence.com https://iheartintelligence.com 32 32 Being Strong Doesn’t Mean Everything Is Okay https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=being-strong-doesnt-mean-everything-is-okay/ Mon, 19 Apr 2021 11:46:32 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=85248 The post Being Strong Doesn’t Mean Everything Is Okay appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

4 Reasons Why Being Strong Doesn’t Mean Everything Is Okay

The problem with being the “strong one” is that everyone always expects you to be okay. Strong people are the ones who are in control of difficult situations when everybody around them is falling apart. They are the ones who want to know how you feel and what they can do to help you. When […]

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The post Being Strong Doesn’t Mean Everything Is Okay appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

4 Reasons Why Being Strong Doesn’t Mean Everything Is Okay

The problem with being the “strong one” is that everyone always expects you to be okay.

Strong people are the ones who are in control of difficult situations when everybody around them is falling apart. They are the ones who want to know how you feel and what they can do to help you. When times are tough, they are the ones who muster up the courage to keep fighting. On the outside, it may seem as though they are not affected by the challenges and obstacles they face; in reality, however, they too need a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on.

There are 4 reasons why strong people are not always okay. 

1. They are always overwhelmed.

A strong person tends to do their best to ensure that the people they love are as happy as possible. Subsequently, they take on various tasks and projects to help them out. Moreover, they are always there when problems arise and, more often than not, they are the ones who handle them.

2. They neglect their needs.

Prioritizing the needs of others means that you forget to pay attention to your own needs. Strong people will always put the ones they love first as they want to make sure they are okay. While this behavior is indeed something that we must admire, it can also have negative effects. In other words, when you never look after your own needs, you are bound to negatively impact your emotional, mental, and physical wellbeing.

3. They allow people to take advantage of them.

When everybody knows that you will put their needs and wants before your own, they will use you. Unfortunately, strong people often get burned and hurt by those who take advantage of them. This is because they refuse to say no when somebody asks for help as they believe it is their duty to lend a helping hand when it is needed.

4. They ignore their emotions.

A strong person knows that people rely on them. They know that when something bad happens, they have to be the ones who hold it together while the others fall apart. Therefore, no matter how broken they may feel inside, they know that they have to bottle it up and put on a brave face. They pretend to be happy and they act as though they never cry. While they fool everyone around them, they are secretly hurting inside.

And the worst part is that, as a result of all this, nobody will ever ask: “Are you okay?”

If you know someone who has been putting on a brave face, neglecting their needs, and prioritizing your happiness, let them know you love them. More importantly, ask them how they are.

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You Can Make Your Life Easier By Accepting The Present Moment https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=you-can-make-your-life-easier-by-accepting-the-present-moment/ Thu, 01 Apr 2021 09:52:22 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=85162 The post You Can Make Your Life Easier By Accepting The Present Moment appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

You Can Make Your Life Easier By Accepting The Present Moment

Learning how to live in the present moment can and will change your life. Indeed, it is difficult to change the way your mind works and how you view the world. However, with daily practice, mindfulness, and awareness, you will be able to master the art of living in the present. When we live in […]

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The post You Can Make Your Life Easier By Accepting The Present Moment appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

You Can Make Your Life Easier By Accepting The Present Moment

Learning how to live in the present moment can and will change your life.

Indeed, it is difficult to change the way your mind works and how you view the world. However, with daily practice, mindfulness, and awareness, you will be able to master the art of living in the present. When we live in the moment, we live life to the fullest; that is, we do not worry about the past and we are not anxious about the future. In other words, we dedicate our entire being to the moment.

How do you learn to accept the present?

1. Acknowledge your emotions

Many people try to run away from how they feel as they are afraid that their emotions will take control. Therefore, they bury their feelings and pretend that they are not there. Doing this is unhealthy and self-destructive as, sooner or later, these emotions will come pouring out and you will feel incapable of stopping them. For this reason, it is better, healthier, and easier to acknowledge your emotions when you feel them. Admittedly, this means accepting that you will often feel hurt and uncomfortable; however, it also means knowing that the pain will be temporary.

2. Do not resist the present

If there is nothing you can do to change your current situation, accept it. We often find ourselves in situations we do not like but cannot change. The perfect example is the Coronavirus pandemic and the lockdown measures which were put in place. Rather than resisting the present and complaining about something you cannot change, accept it. Accepting the present and your current situation will make it easier for you to see (and be grateful for) the little blessings around you.

3. If you can, change it.

When you have the power to change something that makes you unhappy, do it. Living in the present does not mean being passive or submissive. It means being aware of everything that you have and all the opportunities that you are given. When we do not live in the present, we miss out on opportunities. Remember to accept your situation when you cannot change it and to change it when you can. In both cases, you will be living life to the fullest.

4. Do not live in the past or future

Worrying about the past and stressing about the future will not bring about any change. When we ignore the present to focus on the past or future, we engage in self-destructive behavior. That is, we make ourselves feel afraid, anxious, and upset as we do not have any control. Instead of worrying about what has passed or what may come, focus on the present moment. It is the only one that matters.

Of course, learning how to master these four steps will require time, effort, and patience. However, it will undoubtedly be worth it.

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Are you a narcissist? 10 narcissistic traits you probably have and don’t even know it https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=are-you-a-narcissist-10-narcissistic-traits-you-probably-have-and-dont-even-know-it/ Thu, 11 Feb 2021 10:40:53 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=82707 The post Are you a narcissist? 10 narcissistic traits you probably have and don’t even know it appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Are you a narcissist? 10 narcissistic traits you probably have and don't even know it

Are you a narcissist? Perhaps, the little voice in your head will loudly scream a firm ‘NO!’ However, this may be further from the truth than you imagine. In general, narcissists are self-absorbed creatures whose minds are ‘preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, and beauty’, as described by Mayo Clinic. Individuals who show vivid […]

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The post Are you a narcissist? 10 narcissistic traits you probably have and don’t even know it appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Are you a narcissist? 10 narcissistic traits you probably have and don't even know it

Are you a narcissist? Perhaps, the little voice in your head will loudly scream a firm ‘NO!’

However, this may be further from the truth than you imagine.

In general, narcissists are self-absorbed creatures whose minds are ‘preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, and beauty’, as described by Mayo Clinic. Individuals who show vivid signs of narcissistic personalities cannot live without being admired and believe it is their right to take advantage of others whenever they please. Their controlling nature often turns them into manipulators who play with others’ feelings in order to get exactly what they want.

Interestingly, many people have no idea they are narcissists. Are you one of those people?

Here are 10 signs you might be a narcissist and don’t even know it: 

1. You enjoy telling people what to do.

One of the main characteristics of narcissists is that they feel at their best when they are in a leading position and have the actual right to tell others what to do. You may be a natural-born leader, but you may also be a narcissist. This is something you should probably think about.

2. You prefer to be the speaker rather than the listener. 

Instead of listening to others boring you with their dull stories, you prefer to tell them all about the awesome things that had just happened to you. Somehow, you end up dominating in most of the conversations you are involved in. But that doesn’t bother you because you love being the center of attention anyway.

3. You feel that being mean to people is necessary. 

Sometimes, after someone has offended you or hurt your feelings, you believe that being mean to them is justified. So, you allow yourself to cross some serious boundaries in order to pay back for the wrongdoing you have been a victim of. But in many cases, you later realize that the person you were mean to did nothing to deserve such a toxic treatment.

4. You think you don’t get the recognition you deserve.

After all the effort you have put into being the best at everything, people constantly fail to appreciate you. Or at least, that’s what you are convinced of. Narcissists usually believe they are better than everyone else, and they deserve to be put on a pedestal for their tremendous achievements.

5. You constantly roll your eyes at the stupidity of others.

‘Seriously, why is everyone so stupid?!’ This thought crosses your mind at least once a day, accompanied by a serious eye-roll. Maybe you are really surrounded by idiots, but the bigger chances are that you are simply a know-it-all narcissist with a strong sense of superiority. As such, getting along with other people seems quite annoying because you feel like everyone around you is intellectually challenged.

6. You carefully choose your friends so you can look cool.

Whenever you’re about to make friends, one of the main things you consider is the way a certain person would affect your image. Perhaps, you go for people with high social status. You might also prefer to be in the company of academicians and bookworms so you can look intelligent as well. In other words, you see your friends’ prestige not as something you admire, but as something that helps you improve your own persona.

7. You see nothing wrong with putting other people down.

Narcissists are good at analyzing the situations they are involved in and figuring out the best way possible to benefit from them. In case you are a narcissist, if you need to put someone down to make a good impression, you would do it without thinking twice about it. Hurting someone’s feelings is a small price to pay if it will help you obtain the admiration of the observers. Or maybe that’s what you tell yourself when you see the harsh consequences of your mean behavior.

8. You are confident in your superiority. 

There is not a force in this world that can make you doubt your righteousness. However, what makes you feel good about yourself is not that you are always right, but that others see it too. After all, what is the point of being superior if there is no one to appreciate it, right?

9. You are afraid of showing emotions.

In your mind, showing your vulnerable side to someone means showing weakness and instability. As a person who despises being seen as less than, you avoid being emotional at all costs. You prefer to bottle up your feelings, despite the inner pain this causes you. This behavior is triggered by the fear of being affected by something or someone outside of your control.

10. You constantly fall in and out of love.

You are attractive, and you know it, which is often the reason for your failed relationships. Most of the time, you blame your partners for being not fun enough, not adventurous enough, or not intelligent enough to keep you. Well, at first, you believe you are madly in love with the most perfect human being you know. But as soon as reality hits, the smallest imperfection you see in your significant other is enough to make you have a change of heart. And no matter how many times you go through this, you never consider yourself as the problem – it’s always the other person.

Did you relate to some of these signs of narcissism? Did you think of someone you know who might be a narcissist? Leave a comment let us know! 

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6 Warning Signs That You’re Arguing With A Sociopath https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=6-warning-signs-that-youre-arguing-with-a-sociopath/ Fri, 05 Feb 2021 10:26:02 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=81525 The post 6 Warning Signs That You’re Arguing With A Sociopath appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

6 Warning Signs That You're Arguing With A Sociopath

Arguing is never easy, no matter your opponent. Sometimes they can be thick-headed and refuse to budge despite being proven wrong, but normally, you can come to some kind of peace deal. When you’re faced with a sociopath, however, the story is completely different. Because that kind of person will never back down and will […]

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The post 6 Warning Signs That You’re Arguing With A Sociopath appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

6 Warning Signs That You're Arguing With A Sociopath

Arguing is never easy, no matter your opponent. Sometimes they can be thick-headed and refuse to budge despite being proven wrong, but normally, you can come to some kind of peace deal.

When you’re faced with a sociopath, however, the story is completely different.

Because that kind of person will never back down and will do whatever they can to fool and manipulate you.

Understanding the type of person that you’re dealing with is crucial for knowing whether they are worth your energy or not. So here are 6 warning signs that you’re arguing with a sociopath.

1. Constant lies and excuses

We all mess up every once in a while, but sociopaths come up with excuses more often than they keep their promises. Their words never match up with their actions, and their blatant lies disappoint you so often that you actually celebrate when they do something remotely decent. They have trained you to be grateful for mediocre treatment.

2. They never accept the blame

One of the most common and ugly traits of sociopaths is that they are incapable of remorse. In addition, they have giant egos that make them think that they are never wrong. In combination, these two traits create someone who is never willing to take ownership of their own mistakes and always looks for others to blame.

3. They love playing the victim

Their ugly behavior tends to always lead back to a conversation about their suffering in the past or an abusive ex or heartless boss. You will find yourself feeling sorry for them, even when they do something terrible. And once they have managed to divert your attention, everything will go back to being a mess again.

4. Their moods shift in dramatic ways

One minute they assure you they’re completely fine and collected, and the next minute they explode with rage. It is an experience similar to dealing with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, with the difference that they switch characters much more regularly.

5. They gaslight you

Gaslighting is one of the most dangerous things sociopaths do. This often means that they twist the truth around an event and make you believe that you are the one who remembers it wrong or doesn’t see it for what it actually is. The aim here is to make you question your own sanity, leaving you with no choice but to trust them fully.

6. They play with your emotions to get what they want

When you two end up arguing, their goal becomes for you to lose your patience and explode. If they manage to do that, they have a much better chance at manipulating you. They will poke your weak spots and make you say things you know you shouldn’t say so they can then accuse you of acting crazy and hysterical.

If you have anyone in your life who exhibits these signs, it’s time to run for the hills. Their toxicity might end up causing you great harm, and there is simply no point to argue with a person like that, because they will never listen to anything you say.

We hope this article was helpful to you. Let us know your thoughts on the topic by joining the conversation in the comments and please share this article if you’ve found it of value. 

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10 Symptoms Of Complex PTSD https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=10-symptoms-of-complex-ptsd/ Fri, 18 Dec 2020 07:14:55 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=79839 The post 10 Symptoms Of Complex PTSD appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

10 Symptoms Of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

What is complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD)? Complex PTSD is a mental illness which can make life extremely difficult. While most of us have heard of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), very few people are familiar with Complex PTSD. What differentiates these two mental illnesses is that while PTSD is brought on by a single traumatic […]

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10 Symptoms Of Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

What is complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD)?

Complex PTSD is a mental illness which can make life extremely difficult. While most of us have heard of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), very few people are familiar with Complex PTSD. What differentiates these two mental illnesses is that while PTSD is brought on by a single traumatic event such as a natural disaster/car accident, Complex PTSD develops due to prolonged, repetitive trauma experienced in one’s early life (childhood – young adulthood). According to the U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs, in 1988, Dr. Judith Herman of Harvard University suggested a new diagnosis (Complex PTSD) was needed to describe the symptoms of long-term trauma. The symptoms of Complex PTSD include those of PTSD plus several additional symptoms.

What are the 10 symptoms of Complex PTSD? 

1. You never feel safe.

This symptom is common to both PTSD and Complex PTSD. Feeling hypervigilant and being on constant alert is one of the primary symptoms. You fear and feel as though you are not safe or secure – even though you logically know that there is nothing to be afraid of. Despite the awareness that your feelings and thoughts are irrational, you feel as though you are constantly in danger.

2. You cannot control your emotions.

Complex PTSD can make it difficult to manage your emotions. This means that you often have uncontrollable outbursts and feel vulnerable to negative emotions such as anger and fear. The inability to regulate your emotions can lead to disruptive, self-destructive behaviors.

3. You cannot relax or sleep.

Despite acknowledging that you feel fatigued and exhausted, you cannot relax. It is not surprising that when you feel as though you are in constant danger, your body cannot relax and your mind will not let it rest. What is more, when you manage to fall asleep, you wake up numerous times throughout the night and sleep until late. This inability to sleep makes regulating your emotions even more difficult.

4. You avoid triggers.

Another common symptom of PTSD and CPTSD is avoiding things, people, or places which trigger you. Encountering similar situations or being in the same place where your traumatic experience occurred can cause anxiety and panic. Some people’s avoidance is so intense that it prevents them from even leaving the house.

5. You dislike yourself.

Experiencing negative feelings for prolonged periods of time can drastically lower your self-esteem. You can begin to view yourself as weak as you feel as though you cannot overcome your trauma. Moreover, you may even experience shame, guilt, and self-doubt.

6. You often forget important things.

This is a consequence of dissociation. CPTSD can affect your state of consciousness and make you forget crucial events. Taking this further, you may often feel detached from your emotions, your memories, and who you are.

7. You have difficulties trusting people.

People with CPTSD tend to have issues with relationships as they do not know how to fully trust somebody. This inability to trust stems from their traumatic experiences – especially if they have been brought about by someone they initially trusted. It is important to note that others who struggle with CPTSD might look for partners who are emotionally unavailable or toxic as this is what they themselves are familiar with.

8. You are very rigid.

You have strict systems, routines, and rules in place. Furthermore, you do not like changes and you find it difficult to adapt. The reason why you enjoy having a solid, rigid system and routine is that it gives you a sense of complete control, safety, and security. In other words, it makes you feel protected.

9. You work incessantly.

Diving into your career and constantly working also makes you feel in control. In addition to this, it makes it easier for you to drown out the negative thoughts and feelings which creep up at other times.

10. You feel obsessed with your abuser.

Complex PTSD can make you fixated on your trauma and abuser. This means that people often become obsessed with the idea of getting revenge.

If you relate to the majority of the above symptoms, it is vital that you take a step back and evaluate how you are feeling. More importantly, you should consider seeking help and talking to somebody who will guide you through the thoughts and emotions which you have. The crucial thing to know is that Complex PTSD is treatable even though it might take a long time to feel as though you have regained control.

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6 Reasons Why You Should Stop Taking Things Personally https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=6-reasons-why-you-should-stop-taking-things-personally/ Thu, 10 Dec 2020 14:32:39 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=79655 The post 6 Reasons Why You Should Stop Taking Things Personally appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

6 Reasons Why You Should Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking everything personally can lead to anxiety and depression. When we take things personally, we push others away and isolate ourselves. This isolation can make us feel intense loneliness, extreme sadness and even depression. To save our mental health, live a happier life, and keep the ones that we hold dear in our lives, it […]

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The post 6 Reasons Why You Should Stop Taking Things Personally appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

6 Reasons Why You Should Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking everything personally can lead to anxiety and depression.

When we take things personally, we push others away and isolate ourselves. This isolation can make us feel intense loneliness, extreme sadness and even depression. To save our mental health, live a happier life, and keep the ones that we hold dear in our lives, it is vital that we learn how to stop taking things personally and let things go.

There are six reasons why you should stop taking things personally

1. Everybody believes that they are right — just like you. 

One of the main reasons why people take things personally is because they think that any contrasting view is an attack on them. They believe that they are right and that those who claim otherwise are insulting them. In order to stop taking things personally, it is important to remember that there are over 7 billion people in the world and just like you, they all think that they are right. Accept that people are different and often have clashing views.

2. You become affected by your interpretation of what happens. 

When somebody says or does something, they are not immediately affecting your feelings. Everything that happens is first perceived and interpreted in your head. You can then choose how it affects you emotionally. If two people – a close friend and a stranger – say the same hurtful words to you, you will experience two different things. You may feel hurt, attacked, and betrayed by a friend while you may completely dismiss the stranger’s remark. This goes to show that what one does is not directly affecting you but rather, it is your interpretation of the event which affects you.

3. You do not always have to act on your emotions.

It is normal to experience negative emotions such as defensiveness, anger, rejection or sadness. However, this does not mean that you should act on them. Sometimes, it is best to acknowledge how you feel and let things go. Not everything is worth an argument and not everyone is trying to purposely hurt you. Accept, let go, and forgive.

4. You subconsciously agree with what is being said if you take it personally.

Often, it is our own insecurities and the belief that we are not good enough that makes us take things personally. For example, if you get upset when someone criticizes you, it is possible that the reason you get hurt is because you subconsciously believe what they say. If your self-esteem and confidence is low, you might be unable to take constructive criticism.

5. You should become more willing to challenge and change your own beliefs.

If somebody has a contrasting opinion, do not immediately claim that they are wrong. More importantly, do not immediately assume that they are attacking your views. Instead, try to see things from their perspective and admit when you are wrong. There is no shame in changing your mind when presented with new information – in fact, it takes a strong person to stand up and admit that maybe, they were wrong.

6. By taking everything personally, you give up your power. 

Being easily affected by the words of strangers, friends, and family means constantly putting your happiness in other people’s hands. It is up to you to reign in your emotions and change your reactions. Allowing the words of others to upset you means letting the people around you dictate how you feel.

The next time you feel like someone’s words are intended to be a hurtful, personal attack, remember the above points.

More importantly, remember to breathe before reacting. First, examine how you feel and then choose how you want to interpret the situation. Ask yourself: Is their action actually disrespectful or do I just feel disrespected? Once you clarify things for yourself, refuse to give in to your emotions. Accept that you cannot please everybody and that there will always be people who criticize your words and actions.

Ultimately, learn that what other people say and do has more to do with their character than it does with yours.

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Losing your identity in a relationship: 6 things you should do to prevent that https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=losing-your-identity-in-a-relationship-6-things-you-should-do-to-prevent-that/ Thu, 10 Dec 2020 14:31:00 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=79158 The post Losing your identity in a relationship: 6 things you should do to prevent that appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Losing your identity in a relationship: 6 things you should do to prevent that

Love is the force that drives everything around us. Being in a relationship with someone whose deep feelings match with yours is one of the best feelings in this world. However, you should never allow your partner, regardless of how much they mean to you, to force you into losing your identity. Oftentimes, as the […]

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Losing your identity in a relationship: 6 things you should do to prevent that

Love is the force that drives everything around us.

Being in a relationship with someone whose deep feelings match with yours is one of the best feelings in this world.

However, you should never allow your partner, regardless of how much they mean to you, to force you into losing your identity.

Oftentimes, as the bond matures, we need to make compromises with our partners in order to keep a healthy balance. However, if the compromises and sacrifices in your relationship are one-sided, you need to do some serious reevaluation. If you continue neglecting your own needs for the sake of your significant other’s welfare, you will eventually lose your identity.

To prevent this from happening, you need to realize that love isn’t about going to infinity and beyond for someone, even if they don’t make the slightest effort. It’s about giving and receiving. It’s about being able to be yourself without fear. To do the things that make you happy without hesitation.

So, if you don’t want to lose your identity in a relationship, here are 6 essential things you need to do:

1. Do things that bring you joy.

The fact that you are in a couple does not imply you cannot have happy moments on your own. You may love your partner with your whole heart, but this doesn’t mean you should give yourself up and ignore your personal needs. Put yourself first sometimes. Do the things you are truly passionate about. Invest some time and energy into self-care. After all, if you are not happy by yourself, you can never be genuinely happy in a relationship. So, doing the things you love is not selfish but necessary.

2. Date yourself for a change.

Spend some of your free time dating yourself. Take yourself out on a brunch. Go shopping on your own. Indulge in some soulsearching by yourself. Focus on your own interests and passions. Whenever you are in your own company, you have the freedom to enjoy life without fearing someone might judge your choices and preferences. Besides, it gives you that quality time you need to rewind and reflect on your own.

3. Don’t lose touch with your friends and family.

Sometimes we allow our partners to take control of our lives and isolate us from our closest people. This way, not only do we lose touch with friends and family, but we lose ourselves as well. To prevent this from happening, make sure you keep in touch with people outside of your relationship. Spend time with your best friends. Don’t miss important family gatherings. After all, these are the people who help you grow and support you unconditionally. So, don’t let yourself forget there are other valuable individuals in your life besides your significant other.

4. Set healthy boundaries.

Every relationship needs boundaries. Period. They are incredibly necessary, especially when it comes to preserving your identity while in a couple. To have a healthy bond with your partner, you need to talk things through and let them know which lines they should never cross. Of course, you also need to ask them about their own limitations. This will prevent your relationship from turning into a living, all-consuming hell.

5. Don’t let your emotions consume you.

Love makes us do crazy things. It often tricks us into letting our emotions drive us. But there are times when we need to listen to our minds too. Neglecting all logic and rationality with the pretext we do it for love can end up creating terminal damage. While being emotional is not a bad thing, allowing your emotions to fully devour your sanity can never end well.

6. Don’t be afraid of letting go.

Life is a mess. It’s chaotic, confusing, and beyond baffling. Its unpredictable nature implies that we can never know what’s next. The same goes for relationships. Not every single bond is meant to last. We can’t do anything else but learn to accept that fact. So when the time comes, and you and your partner decide to go on your separate ways, just let go. The thought that it’s times better to be on your own than in a relationship that erases your identity will help you move on.

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Don’t Teach Children To Never Be Angry – Teach Them How To Be Angry https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=dont-teach-children-to-never-be-angry-teach-them-how-to-be-angry/ Mon, 16 Nov 2020 13:22:23 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=80576 The post Don’t Teach Children To Never Be Angry – Teach Them How To Be Angry appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Teach Your Children How To Manage Their Emotions

A child’s emotional needs are just as important as their physical ones. Parents know that it is their duty to put a roof over their children’s heads and to make sure that they are always fed and clothed. Of course, every child needs and deserves a parent who will go out of their way to […]

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The post Don’t Teach Children To Never Be Angry – Teach Them How To Be Angry appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Teach Your Children How To Manage Their Emotions

A child’s emotional needs are just as important as their physical ones.

Parents know that it is their duty to put a roof over their children’s heads and to make sure that they are always fed and clothed. Of course, every child needs and deserves a parent who will go out of their way to ensure that they are physically safe and secure. However, what many parents do not know is that, in addition to a child’s physical needs, their emotional needs must also be fulfilled. In other words, while many parents do everything in their power to take care of their children’s physical needs, they often emotionally neglect them. Many do so unintentionally as they are not aware of how children’s emotional needs must be approached or fulfilled. For this reason, many children grow up not knowing how to manage their emotions.

What are a child’s emotional needs?

According to the parenting expert and family therapist Meri Wallace LCSW, ‘Children come into the world with certain basic emotional needs: the need to feel loved and the need for a positive self-esteem. As a parent, it is your job to be aware of these needs, and communicate with your child in a way that will support your child’s positive growth.’ Therefore, it is a parent’s duty to not only provide for and take care of the physical safety of their child but to also pay attention to their emotions and their needs. Moreover, it is a parent’s job to teach their child how to manage their emotions because navigating life without knowing how to deal with your feelings can be difficult and painful.

8 things you should do to teach your children how to manage their emotions.

1. Ask them how they feel.

Parents who emotionally neglect their children rarely ask them how they feel. A child needs to know that they can safely share their feelings; moreover, by asking them how they feel, you are encouraging them to look inward and become more self-aware. Being self-aware and knowing how to label your feelings is important as it allows one to gain a better understanding of who they are.

2. Do not make them think that certain emotions are ‘bad’. 

Teaching your children to suppress their anger can have many negative effects. If a child grows up thinking that certain emotions are ‘bad’, they may grow up believing that there is something wrong with them for feeling these emotions. Instead of teaching your child to suppress these emotions, teach them how to manage them.

3. Teach them the importance of positive self-talk.

Let your children know that they should be kind to themselves. Remind them how important it is to talk positively about their abilities and appearances. Moreover, teach them how to motivate themselves when times are difficult and stressful.

4. Talk about uncomfortable emotions.

Although it will be difficult, it is your job as a parent to be willing to talk about things that may be uncomfortable. Let your children know that they are not alone and that you will always be there to listen.

5. Let them express themselves.

Sometimes, children find it easier to express themselves and their emotions in more creative ways. In other words, they may play an instrument, paint, draw, or write. Allow them to do what makes them feel comfortable and at ease. Everybody needs an outlet for their emotions.

6. Explain how you handle your emotions. 

Talk to them about how you manage and control your feelings. For example, let them know what breathing techniques you use when you get anxious or how you handle your anger so that you do not unintentionally hurt your loved ones.

7. Set a good example emotionally.

More often than not, children learn by observing. This means that if they see you lashing out and overreacting when you get angry, they are probably going to grow up to do so too. If you take control of your emotions and ensure that you handle feelings in a healthy way, your children will learn from the examples you set.

8. Find a way to explain emotions in a way they find relatable. 

Try using examples from the books and shows they like to make difficult emotions more relatable and easy to understand. If they see someone expressing anger on a show they watch, explain what they are seeing and ask how it makes them feel.

Knowing how to manage your emotions can help make your life easier. Teach your children how to control and handle their feelings to ensure their healthy growth and development.

The post Don’t Teach Children To Never Be Angry – Teach Them How To Be Angry appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

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Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=sometimes-the-one-who-is-always-there-for-others-needs-someone-to-be-there-for-them/ Thu, 12 Nov 2020 10:59:16 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=76764 The post Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them

When you are someone who is always ready to help others, the levels of your emotions can get quite high. You are filled with kindness and sensitivity and you carry love and compassion for every living being. Your heart is made of pure gold and you are giving by nature. But keep in mind that […]

The post Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

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The post Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

Sometimes The One Who Is Always There For Others Needs Someone To Be There For Them

When you are someone who is always ready to help others, the levels of your emotions can get quite high.

You are filled with kindness and sensitivity and you carry love and compassion for every living being. Your heart is made of pure gold and you are giving by nature. But keep in mind that these special qualities are often the reason for you getting hurt. You always give your all to those in need, but in turn, you exhaust your own energy.

You are hurting and wondering whether someone will ask how you’re feeling, whether you need any help.

Your heart suffers when you think of all the times you gave your soul to someone without getting even an ounce of appreciation back; all those times you helped people take care of their problems, and now, when you’re the one who’s down, there is no one to help you get back up.

So, you need some time to recover.

You must find the strength and courage inside you so you can stand tall and strong again. And, as it turns out, the time you spent on your own provided you with energy and a will to tell yourself that you don’t need to be saved and that you can face all the challenges life throws at you without the help of others.

But no matter how strong you may be, sometimes you do need to be helped…

There are times when even the toughest person needs someone to be there for them just like they are for the people around them. There are times when the one who smiles the brightest is the one who carries the most sadness and loneliness inside. There are times when the person who motivates and pushes others to believe in themselves also needs to be told that they matter.

Hence, if you are the kind of person who always helps others out, please keep in mind that your kind-hearted nature is a rare thing these days.

Also, understand that your ability to calm people down when they’re going through the worst times in their lives and make them laugh when they feel like crying is a priceless gift. Never forget that the healing powers you possess can inspire and help people to keep on going when times are hard. You give people around you a purpose to live and you teach them how to love themselves.

And that is why you should keep reminding yourself that you deserve every bit of positivity and love coming your way.

You deserve to have people in your life who would do anything to help you out, just as you do it for them. Because, after all, you are not made of steel.

You are a human being and you need rest, just like others do. You don’t have to carry all the troubles of the world on your shoulders. You don’t have to be everyone’s savior and it’s not your job to heal every disappointed heart out there. Sometimes, you need to take the time to heal too. And you need to do everything you can to give some of that energy you so selflessly give others to yourself.

And in conclusion, don’t forget that you don’t always have to be at 100%.

Sometimes, you too are allowed to ask for help and guidance. Because you are precious and you deserve someone to take care of you, just like the way you take care of those you love and cherish.

We hope you’ve found this article helpful. Let us know your thoughts on the topic by joining the conversation in the comments, and please share if you’ve enjoyed the read. 

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5 warning signs that your friendship is actually toxic https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=5-warning-signs-that-your-friendship-is-actually-toxic/ Tue, 15 Sep 2020 11:14:48 +0000 https://www.jlawjdv.nl/?man=?p=74672 The post 5 warning signs that your friendship is actually toxic appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

5 warning signs that your friendship is actually toxic

Many write and discuss toxic partners – but what about toxic friendships? Toxic friends can be just as harmful as romantic relationships with toxic partners. Friends are the family that you choose: they are the brothers and sisters which you pick, they know everything about you, they are the people you run to and confide […]

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The post 5 warning signs that your friendship is actually toxic appeared first on I Heart Intelligence.com.

5 warning signs that your friendship is actually toxic

Many write and discuss toxic partners – but what about toxic friendships?

Toxic friends can be just as harmful as romantic relationships with toxic partners. Friends are the family that you choose: they are the brothers and sisters which you pick, they know everything about you, they are the people you run to and confide in. Unsurprisingly, if these people do not have your best interests at heart, you might find that the people you consider to be family can actually cause you more pain and distress than anybody else. According to Mary Wright, a writer for The Power of Silence, there are five warning signs that you should look out for:

1. They make you feel like you do not deserve them. 

If your friend is constantly pointing out all of your flaws, talking down on you, and making you feel inadequate, then they definitely do not have your best interests at heart. A true friend would constantly show you that they love, value, and respect you. What is more, when times are difficult and you struggle to see the good in yourself, a friend would remind you of your strengths. 

2. They never make time for you. 

You know that if your best friend was to call and say they needed help, support, or a shoulder to cry on – you would be there in the blink of an eye. A toxic friendship is one in which this is not reciprocated. If you find that you are always there for them but they never show up when you need them most, then they are not worth your time and effort.

3. You make excuses for their behavior.

When you excuse their bad behavior, you are doing so with the hopes of justifying why you are still friends with them. Even when you know that they are toxic, you will try to convince yourself that they are not and that ‘they probably didn’t mean what they said/did’.

4. They make you feel anxious around them.

A healthy friendship would never make you feel afraid, anxious, or worried. Instead, Wright explains it ‘should make you feel happy, loved, understood, secure, and cared for’. If spending time with your friend feels draining, then your connection is probably toxic.

5. You go to extremes to protect their emotions.

Being considerate and respectful is a must in every relationship; however, if it feels as though your friend is overly sensitive and takes pleasure in making you feel guilty, then they are not good for you. Taking this further, if you feel like you are constantly walking on eggshells to make sure that you do not accidentally offend them, then the friendship is probably toxic, manipulative, and draining.

It is important to learn how to recognize the signs of a toxic friendship so that you can cut ties with those who are harmful to you and your wellbeing before it is too late.

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